i Am a LEAF on the Wind

chaos of the making

which word

i Am a LEAF on the Wind floating escaping seeking direction
inside the millions of Words
Hundreds of rules
Thousands of images
i Am a LEAF on the Wind  realising what trees have been
a selection in the forest value of numbers reselection
i Am a LEAF on the Wind Blown away in thousands
curls, swirls, whirls, spinning Twists as to wonder
Where to land

Chaos in the fallen leaf


i Am a LEAF on the Wind
What to say as things, people, trees, rocks, seeds, birds, bees pass BY
i Am a LEAF on the Wind  rushing to find soil
to enter the world of ground
aWay from air bubbles, rumbling resonant vibration
Right back into that wandering feeling to set the first step into the unknown direction
discovering which way to go while roaming
like a leaf on the wind
finding the moment to fall

overwhelming chaos

do you know that feeling

and go against all odds
figuring things out while moving
as a fall is just The beginning of lost memories of
a leaf on the wind is not afraid to fall down
to a new other existent surrounding
to become a nemophilist

chaos inside an image

i must not forget what i did to create the new

The above is not much else than artistic therapy on the moment i feel so overwhelmed by the new project.
Now  a new picture hangs there to remind me
i Am a LEAF on the Wind

It is also a part of showing a more personal struggle that lays behind the Land Art Forest.
Before i had the land and the ideas followed upon it now i have the ideas but not the land.
How to persuade people to join this project, without loosing the artistic approach.
On one side there is the need to be professional according to the rules and perspectives that people have and on the other side lays the forest as art.

seeing chaos

what it should be


In the end
i Am a LEAF on the Wind
ready to fall Down



Leaving details

As a part of an exhibition in 2010 with the title ‘GreenbloodRedblood’ i created some images.

GreenbloodandRedblood 2010



red blood in green

The amazing veins in a leaf searching for that river trail.

How does it flow.

For only a moment.


leaf labyrinth

from green to


it never stays

it goes

leaf remains


half digested by time

one step


its gone into crumbles


leaf white bones



of it goes

into soil

to spread the wings of

new leaf on the wind


In a forest lays the hidden reality, de verborgen werkelijkheid, realidade occult, Realiti cudd, versteckte Realität and so much more.
These photos are experiments with filters and framing the coming months there will be many more experiments.

The camera is fantastic in macro photos and has several possibilities for filters like: fisheye, sparkle, reflection, fragmented, pop art, soft focus, pale light colour, grainy film, pin hole, diorama, dramatic tone.
Not sure by any of them, it can give a mixed reality which i like to achieve in some way. Let the photos be in such a way that people look and wonder what is……….

There will be several series, several stories to tell and one will be the story of a leaf.

The way to show? Perhaps as a collage. Perhaps as a leaf. Not sure, i have plenty ideas.
The roaming balls, the hidden holes, the forgotten tunnel just to mention 3.

The dead leafs are on the path for just a few more weeks so no time for experiment more time for that one moment of seeing.






What is in the name of a TREE

Hedge Clegyr Boia

Hedge above a hedge

So many people said you can’t grow trees here, so many times they said you can’t grow that tree, but the trees did.
There is still a general notion in Pembrokeshire that you can’t grow trees there. It is even used as an argument in planning regulations of the Pembrokeshire Coast National Park.
Yet, you will find trees growing all over Pembrokeshire, even right on the coast.

Beech and Pine Clegyr Boia

who said i can’t grow here

The list of trees you can grow in such an exposed area should be limited. After reading lots of books about the subject and looking at the landscape, certain tree came definitely on the list.
Others were a pure tryout. The above photo shows a Beech tree (Fagus sylvatica) with an old christmas tree. Both trees planted as a tryout.
The Beech was planted in 2003 but it did little to nothing. The X tree was planted in 2005 and suffered but started to grow after just one year.
In 2010 the Beech decided to follow and this photo is taken on 11 May 2012 showing both trees healthy and with lots of new growth. The top of the Beech is a bit weak and hangs down, perhaps it was a bit too greedy.

Flowering Apple Tree

yes Apple can

So many of the other trees proven them all wrong as well. This Apple tree was planted within a shelter facing south and still today provides lovely Apples.
By an old house, which once served as a small country pub, stand some very old Apple trees in the shelter of some Ash trees and Privet (Ligustrum vulgare).
The privets were not cut for a long time and became open trees, still providing enough shelter for the Apple trees.
Learning from the old the new was planted to grow the same way.
On the northern part of the globe it is handy to have the trees sheltered from north and east and facing south. On the southern part you best provide shelter from south, the heath and not the cold.
Make a kind of horse shoe shelter with shrubs and trees.

bramble and young tree

Bramble letting through a young tree

So started a new forest thinking which went well beyond the planting of some trees.
Maintaining 16 acres of land while involved with other Land Art projects and not to forget bringing up a child is a challenge.
Parts of the land had to defend for herself, with some surprising results.
Whenever you go to a blog or website about forestry, you will read about the ‘nasty’ Bramble. A very invasive plant by the looks of it. It literally walks over the land as new shoots grow up at first, then bend down and make new roots for the next step onto the land.
You can cut and pull as much as you want but they keep on going on. In the end just a path was kept free by bending the Brambles back.
One day while doing a routine check i came across a young tree pushing through the Brambles. The tree was never planted it came on its own and was grown over by the Bramble but this seems to help rather than hinder.

Native with NONnative

Native with NONnative

There are many trees and plants for that matter which can be called invasive no matter what their nationality is.
It is a discussion held on many levels in many places about native and nonnative.
An other blogger is giving lots of information about this discussion to prevent the cutting down of a wonderful forest in the name of nonnative tree forest must be replaced.
At times i looked at this issue but did as with all the rest went on and let the trees decide.
The native can live and do live happily next to the nonnative when you give them a change. It is my opinion that diversity is more important in a forest than the native only.
Perhaps the monoculture has created this issue more than we let on.
The Eucalyptus you see here come from that part of Australia which has a similar climate as Pembrokeshire. There are over 700 different Eucalyptus all having their own strength and way to grow. The Eucalyptus on the land are all small Mallee trees, there are even Eucals who don’t grow much bigger than 2 metres (7 feet).
This experience will not stop the discussion but the trees have changed my mind about the native nonnative issue.


All these lessons have taught me one thing look at the trees in the forests to learn and be surprised.
The trees of Land Art Forest will be many of many different kind benefitting the forest each in their own way. Some will be there for fruits and nuts others for their flowers and nectar and other for their amazing looks and some for their wood.
This forest you will see because of the trees as they will not be planted in lines of one variety. All forest are made by trees, Land Art Forest will be trees.





Back to expo thinking, there is no way you can fit a Land Art Forest into a gallery, so forget trying.
The exhibition will contain photos, but how and what keeps floating around in my little idea book.
Where is clear and the room with walls, doors and windows is clear, but the filling and connecting it to the Land Art Forest ……..


a photo of a photo on a sculpture inside the mind of an avatar

inside water
drops within drop
a drop in the ocean
without a drop no ocean
what we see has become a competition of what it should be

flow 21

an other invisible flowing drop

When you observe physical entities, with your observation, they changing their character                (Werner Heisenberg)
free from controle of reason
expressiveness force
creating an image rather than recording it
don’t see what others want you to see
let water and wind play with it

flow 9

flow 9 it is all in your head

For one expo the photos are selected, the medium is still questionable, only need 5 photos there. These 5 will also be a new card serie.
The cards must sell so selection happens in an other way. My more artistic photos do not sell good enough.
The expo in Portugal will not be for sale, creating more freedom of artistic expression.

painted drop

painted drop

Transport is an other issue to consider in the creative progress. Certain ideas dropped of as the small needs to fit inside a suitcase.
Printing a photo on a piece of paper feels not good, gives no expressiveness.
Macro photography seems the opposite of the Land Art Forest of 1 hectare, yet without that small world no forest.
It all starts with one drop.

How to display the beauty of the small to realise the big as we see so little. Our realities alter constantly, so many medias, so many ways.
The budged limits several options, such a pity, the imagination needs no funds but the realisation can’t happen without the dirty word, money.

Somehow some order will appear inside the chaos
one day it will happen
it will all come through




the bigger drop


Non orientable surface concept closely related to projection is the casting of shadows.
If the wire frame from a cube is lit from above the resulting shadow is a square within a square, with the corresponding corners connected.


Black reflection of a forest

it is a tree

Our vision is limited, we only see a small area of our vision, what we can’t see is there.
Our focusing ability is limited, however our brains fill in what we don’t see.
When you observe physical entities with your observation, they are changing their character.

there are shadows

tree in water or the sky


Our reality could be a simulation off ……….  It helps us to deal with our own incapacity to see what is before the beginning and what is behind the end.
The Greeks called it Horror Vacui; fear for empty, nothing exist, there is no driver.
Progress in our intelligence to do so, development of our technologie to do so.

hidden for our eyes



Representing inner reality, feeling combined with thinking, silent memories, silent moment.
Simulation done by others is easy to believe and to explain as it doesn’t focus on our inability to see certain things.
We detect movement more than stillness, contrasting colours.

leaf in mid air leaving



As our minds fill in, who fills in our minds, the camera, the microscope, the movie or the person behind, a book or the writer, the newspaper or the journalist, the frame or the picture.

being in a bubble

the forest


Thanks to a book i realise why we don’t always want to see what there is to see. It put our own vision in a question with several answers.
We don’t see the plants in the details, we can see them, they form a green blur in the passing. We focus on animals, humans, we focus on the centre, contrast.

Plants are all around us under our feet, above our head, left, right, middle, small, big.
Plants fill our air, our water, our soil. Plants live on plants in plants under plants.

Making art with plants you need to learn to see them.


tree flag

Tree Flag

While thinking about the Land Art Forests i have not forgotten about the exhibition and how to show feelings within thinking.
While doing so, the path is filled with new perspectives even in the new sciences of plants. A new way to see nature a way to create nature a way to give nature.




Than just than the water became a mirror as the wind called behind.
It revealed silence in noise, in uproar, sound echo  echo, silence in noise
sound source of silence, underwater while above, on the surface feathers
still there, like screams of geese and line clouds of wasted journeys
silence my mind

paint reality

to see what you and me can’t see
don’t want to see
a laced wing, laced netting, filigree cord sting
intertwine, interweave, mix it all, give it silence
klingerly klang of a horse shoe on concrete

glace wing

see beyond time
a feather comes with thousand drops
to do what hasn’t been done
camera under water under surface reality
dare to see surplace reality shattered movement

under or above thats the question

a boat past, waves come all moves
wobble bobble zobble
into reappearing silence, moved to be stuck
a drop reflection into a subtle action
reaction of a fraction into
inner moment, inner movement
shadows reflection, than just than

moved to be stuck

the boat pushes her under where i lay surprised
faces what to see, no longer care
all them drops
just one little feather
feels so good, so beautiful, attractions
in that one tiny moment of passing

that feather

by elegant, glamour on a surface movement
shift in charm, to relocate me and
seeing beyond, seeing inside reflection, under drops
we only see outer reality
stir, switch, leave, transfer

seeing in three dimension
i have to go now, i need a piss
my inner calling
how to make 2D into 3D with an inner feeling
kijk nou

een veertje dat me heeft leren zien, leren kijken, een ander perspectief.

it will never be sure when or how we see not knowing how to show

mAgdA september 2017 alblasserdam



I woke up with you in mind hearing your shouts, seeing your act art you said art

as i wait for the first bird song you wait for the first embarrassment

you have a name, you have a fame, you teach to earn

scream to act art you say

the thousand fine lines a question the embarrassment



Looking further into some facts

the aim for the shame

searching for what is lost

inside a scream of silence a scream of taal

en nog eens taal

Vergeefse woorden zoeken naar menselijke mening, menselijke redenering

ik herinner, terwijl de vogel mij niet ziet

een vermenging van woordeloze Beelden

Verbeelding van menselijk gezag

het gezegde van een FLITZZZZ

onderweg van het weg zijn van de



roaring trucks, zooming first cars

into the silence faling raindrops, rolling of leaFs


somebody else has been here, footprint from behind

shout for what is lost, what will be lost

only without the anger, leaving that embarrassment

a shout of silenced grieving, act silent walking, over a noisy track

should i act this sadden dance to get attention for loosing

perhaps it is the falling of failing



dat ik bewandel na de nacht

een druppel hier            een druppel daar

een gloeiende plaat, in ieder hoek

taal zeg je een vergeten woord van het niet willen weten

stilletjes nat worden voor het zien van dat kunstzinnige moment

kunst waar vind je dat, aan een hangende tak zonder bladeren

het niet weten voelt veilig aan

nee, laat maar     ik wil het voelen

achter de pijn van verliezen ligt de glorie van schoonheid

DIE komt zonder prijs

dansend over een bank, terwijl de bankrekening loopt leeg

genietend van een teer moment, regen valt niet leeg



treecreeper crawls away vertical movement


the rain truly falls

100 1000000

one hundred million

for a piece of skull

money of dead reminder of bulbs 1640

art for few collecting emptiness, no tax on art

10,000 times 10,000

art against reason a silent reminder of what i don’t want

is het een kunst om iets te maken waarvan iedereen zegt wat knap




is het een kunst om iets te maken wat jezelf niet echt snapt

een vergeten liedje van herman van veen met blijvende gedachte goed

walking back through the rain leaving art well behind

i sell what i create

artinisme off

dripping drops make no difference

i see your anger of lost words

leaf your act of desperation

its all a vague nothing on lendless paper



ik ga verder met mijn zin

zinloos dwalen tussen woorden van niets

lege druppels in jouw haar

warme bries in mijn gedachte

verder heeft het geen